2 Samuel 14

2 Samuel 14

Vernon McGee points out, “God had not forgiven David halfheartedly. God did not say, ‘Well, I forgive you, but we will not have fellowship anymore. I will not restore completely. You and I are admonished, ‘And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God, for Christ’s sake, has forgiven you.’ How are we to forgive other? The same way as God does. David should have forgiven Absalom. He is setting the stage for rebellion. David made a blunder in not forgiving his son as God had forgiven David. He will live to regret it.” Redpath - David’s forgiveness of Absalom was completely inadequate, leading to a further outbreak of sin. God’s forgiveness of a man’s soul is completely adequate, and a great deterrent to continued sin. (PDF - The Making of a Man of God Life of David) Redpath adds "What kind of forgiveness is that? I’ll tell you - - it is the kind we want from God but we never get. O God, forgive us, but please let us go on doing what we are doing. Don’t demand of us repentance. Don’t demand a broken heart. Don’t demand from us a turning away from sin. Lord, please forgive us, for we need to be forgiven, but don’t, please don’t expect any change. God refuses those terms altogether. He will never forgive at the expense of justice. In this instance, David proved the utter futility of any attempt to do so....May God write it on your soul: if the pardon you want is that God should wink at your sin, He will not do it.” (PDF - The Making of a Man of God Life of David) Vos points out, “Joab lost no time in bringing Absalom back to Jerusalem but David tragically did not forgive his son completely. Absalom was confined to his own house for two years without seeing the king. Thus he had plenty of time to nurse his disaffection for the king, and the gulf between them widened.” Ackroyd points out, “Again we observe the irony of the narrative. This turnabout in the affair will bring back Absalom but not to succession and well-being for the kingdom. David’s security will be radically threatened. Absalom will die. The refusal of David to see Absalom represents the vacillation between favor an disfavor. It is as if the king cannot make up his mind to a full reconciliation.” Pulpit Commentary - whatever may have been his professions, Absalom's subsequent conduct is proof that he still regarded Amnon's death as a just retribution for his conduct to Tamar, and secretly cherished a sullen anger against his father for not having punished the wrong doer himself. It was the contrast between his own five years of punishment and the mere verbal reproof which was all that Amnon had to suffer for his shameless conduct, which rankled in Absalom's mind, and gave him an excuse for finally plotting his father's ruin. Ron Lee Davis in his book A forgiving God in an unforgiving world (BORROW THIS BOOK) says, “The forgiveness we must build into our lives and which we seek to model to our children must be free. It must be immediate; it must be final and continuous. We must forgive and forget. That is what the forgiveness of Christ is like. So must our forgiveness be. Over the years I have heard a lot of teaching and preaching on the subject of Colossians 3:20 – ‘Children, obey your parents in everything for this pleases the Lord.’ Yet I’ve heard almost no teaching at all on the very next verse. Indeed, I believe ColosSians 3:21 to be one of the most ignored verse in all the New Testament’s teaching on the Christian home. In the New International Version that verse reads: ‘Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.’ The New American Standard Bible says, ‘Fathers, do not exasperate your children that they may not lose heart.’ (Forgiveness & restored relationships are the key to God’s mighty working in our midst!) In the original Greek that word ‘fathers’ literally means ‘parents’, Moms and Dads. What does the apostle Paul mean when he warns Moms and Dads “Don’t embitter your children. Don’t exasperate your children or they’ll become discouraged and lose heart.” Rich Cathers - What went wrong? It’s hard to know just what went wrong with Absalom. It could be that David made a mistake in restoring Absalom. Some have suggested that David should have fully restored him sooner. Bringing him back but not talking with him is a lot like holding a grudge against a person. Illustration of Holding A Grudge = One day a visitor leaned on the old fence around a farm, while he watched an old farmer plowing with a mule. After a while, the visitor said, “I don’t like to tell you how to run your business, but you would not have to work so hard if you would just say, “gee” and “haw” to that mule instead of just tugging on those lines. The old farmer stopped and pulled a big handkerchief from his pocket and wiped his face. Then he said, “Reckon you’re right, but this animal kicked me five years ago and I ain’t spoke to him since.” Holding grudges can cause us trouble.